Bitch Kitty Racing

As the American Empire quickly crumbles, almost wholly due to the liars and thieves currently running our government (FREE HINCKLEY!), we must remember the words of the person who said, “Blaming George Bush for the ills of America is like blaming Mickey Mouse when Disney screws up.”

Let us also remember King George III, the king who lost America. King George was ill (either with syphilis or “porphyry,” which is, in fact, a kind of rock), and his illness led to bouts of insanity. This insanity, it is said, incapacitated him during the events leading to the American Revolutionary War and, it is also said, is the reason the Americans were successful in their fight for independence, i.e., George was unable to make the correct political decisions necessary to keep his empire whole.

George Bush and his administration have engaged in an endless war and have the blood of countless thousands on their hands. This war has led to political and economic instability in many regions of the world, but especially at home. The current administration actively denies any wrongdoing or responsibility, or even that there is any problem in the first place. America now has high inflation coupled with economic recession, a condition called “stagflation.” Our dollar is buying less and less, and everything is costing more and more. The American Empire is lost economically—we can now only hold on to military power. We are bringing down the world, without even benefit to America itself!

As an American, my family history is rich and varied. I am not Swiss/German Mennonite-American, an Irish Catholic-American, a German Lutheran American, nor an English CoE-American. I am simply referred to as “American.” This title is one I can only wear with pride if I make America a better place: have something to do with keeping my country on track, helping in my community, welcoming the tired, hungry and poor of other nations, or speaking loudly when the government is engaged in actions with which I do not agree. There are many other ways in which I can wear the national title of American with pride.

To global eyes, I am now a member of a nation of thugs. To global eyes, I am responsible for the travesties in Afghanistan and Iraq. To global eyes, my face is that of George Bush. The nationality of American is almost shameful to me.

My Mennonite ancestors came to America for religious freedom. My German ancestors came to America to escape the Kaiser’s wars. My English ancestor came to America for love. My Irish ancestors came to America to escape the tyranny of the English (and were also transported to Australia, as well).

And me? I was born here. I am American. Therefore, let me act in such a manner as to be able to wear that title with pride once again.

The current administration is acting in a fashion which can only be described as “insane.” The United States is becoming increasingly Balkanized by the two-party system. Culturally, each geographic section of this country is as distinct as any tightly-packed country in Europe. The East Coast and the West Coast are prime examples of cultural separation, and L.A. might be seen as entirely distinct from the rest of the nation.

Unlike a monarchical political system, we cannot install a regent to regain control of the country. Unfortunately, we must abide by American law and wait for the next administration to fix things. During the Vietnam War, the country was in a similar political and economic state, especially at the end. Things recovered, and peaked during the Clinton administration. This recovered prosperity has been thrown away by the current administration for reasons unknown, and is unlikely to return within my lifetime.

It’s time to start anew.

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. (For the remainder of the Declaration of Independence, click: here)

I have stated my causes. I believe that the government of the United States of America needs to treat me as a sovereign human being, and not as a subject.

I am seceding. Every step I occupy is now a sovereign nation. I would very much like to take all of Seattle with me, and invite the all the lands west of the Cascades, from the Canadian border to the southern reaches of the City of San Francisco to join me. We have all the necessary resources to exist comfortably; we are like-minded politically and culturally; together, we have the power to pull this off successfully.

I hereby declare that the name of this country is “America.” Let them have the name “United States of America.” I still believe in the ideals of a free nation made of free people, working towards the common good of all. And unlike Washington DC, I do not hate Mexicans.

I’d like to invite Hillary Rodham-Clinton and Madeline Albright to help us set this up, George Stephanopoulos to be the press secretary, and Bob Costas to commentate.

Viva la Revolucion!